Being alone sometimes provides amazing opportunities and yields marvelous results. So I believe .
This doesn't always amount to loneliness, and this certainly cannot really be labeled as something detestable; in fact, this is what some of us might seek in the midst of the chaotic happenings that constitute our normal, everyday life.
Now and then, a poignant desire to define myself in at least some way has surfaced, wanting me to say in somewhat clear terms, what would be a pleasing experience for me if I had to spend a significant part of my time all by myself. Will I be able to consider it to be enjoyable ? Or would it feel like being cornered into accepting these lonely spells ? The answer is still not too clear, though I feel I have slowly grown to appreciate these spells and... do I love these? I still cannot be too sure...
More often than not, I find myself moving involuntarily, with a book in hand, towards a bench under a shady tree in a grassy lot, or a corner table in some cafeteria that would offer a vista to gaze upon , choosing to be with myself for a while, and being a silent bystander. There is so much pleasure in watching , feeling the melancholy of the road that bends ahead and disappears behind the old, history laden houses, observing how the trees that line the arcade speak softly to the breeze, how a solitary passerby saunters on, how the sun paints the houses and how the deep shade drenches some of the tired walls.
Life carrying on, for everybody and every creature. Some stopping to pick up too many pebbles on their way, some completely unaware of any lying in their path. Regardless, people move on. Thoughts, thoughts and more thoughts! Watching, observing and reading ! Armed with a book and an eye for observation, all interminable periods of waiting in long queues, in doctors' chambers, in government offices and many other such instances that form an integral part of our urban lives, become periods of respite and even pleasure!
Reading a book is choosing to spend time with the author. With his magical ability with words, in addition to being entertaining and amusing , he does inspire me ever so often, to find courage to take that next step when I am down in the doldrums , his mind resonates with mine and brings on the elation that springs up on realizing that there is someone in this world who surprisingly thinks like me and is able to put down those thoughts on paper for me, to read and discover the joy of finding a like-minded person.
I feel I have found a true friend! It is a pity that most of these friends never meet and never hear each other's voices. Yet there is a conversation that fills the mind and a joy that fills the heart. In such times, do I really need to talk? Perhaps yes, to share this happiness with another similarly-smitten soul !
At the end of the day, we humans do need people to share our innermost joys with, don't we, now!
